HEAVY DOWNPOURS AFFECT MAJORITY OF DREAM WORLD

By: Roman

Attention to all of our readers: you’re going to need a bigger umbrella.

The latest weather report from the weather service is indicating that rain showers have transitioned into thunderstorms for a grand majority of the dream world. The skies have gotten darker and visibility has lowered across the dream world. The DWPS issued a Special Weather Bulletin discussing this.

In addition to discussing the ongoing weather event, the weather service also pointed out that there is an increasing threat of severe weather too. Per the DWPS website, thunderstorms have a slight chance to turn severe in nature. When they do, they are associated with gusty winds, frequent lighting— and in more severe scenarios— hail and possibly a tornado.

“We stress that it's always important to have a plan in place when severe weather strikes, and of course, a way to receive alerts,” senior meteorologist Neige said, “The spring season has all sorts of threats, but when you're prepped and ready, it shouldn't be scary.”

Across the dream world, many areas are seeing torrential downpours that will persist through the rest of the month, according to Neige. He says that those considering to travel should refrain from doing so, unless it is deemed essential.

“It’s quite the situation out on the roadways of the rural dream world right now. Very heavy rain is making travel difficult with lower than average visibility,” Neige explained, “If you don’t have to be out for an essential reason, just shelter in place. This isn’t anything like last November, but it is a nuisance if you need to go out for something like work, errands, or the like.”

Neige said that the weather service has spoken with other agencies in coordinating information and stated that he doesn’t expect any shutdowns because of it.

“We’ve spoken with agencies like the postal service and the patrol unit to give detailed information about the weather since many of their workers have to travel in such conditions,” Neige explained, “From what was discussed, I do not think there will be any sort of wide disruptions to any service, but it may be a tad bit slower in areas where the weather is more tough.”

Neige stated that the weather service is constantly monitoring conditions and will provide additional updates if anything comes up.

“We’re always constantly monitoring conditions. Don’t be surprised if we start issuing alerts for severe thunderstorms in the coming days and weeks,” Neige said, “Like we’ve stressed, just be prepared for anything and know where to go and what to do. You can trust us to keep you safe.”

For the latest weather forecast in your area or other areas in the dream world, visit the DWPS’ website or visit your local forecasting office for additional resources.

GENERAL CRIME FALLS FOR SECOND MONTH IN A ROW

By: Oswald

The Dimension Investigation Agency has released their crime report numbers for the month of April and based on preliminary data, overall crime in the dream world is down for the second month in a row.

According to the numbers, the DIA reported 1,213 total reports of crime accross the dream world for the month of April. That’s about a 29 percent decrease from March when it was reported that 1,719 crimes had taken place that month. Furthermore, 8,731 crimes have been reported in the dream world for the year.

The DIA is attributing this decrease as a result of the agency’s latest policies.

“We’ve managed to get a second month in a row where crime is falling thanks to chief detective Sylveran’s new policies that he put forth since day one,” Kristopher Levy, DIA spokesperson said in a public statement this morning, “These policies are working and the DIA has been working around the clock to solve cases faster and get these criminals arrested and off of our streets.”

Levy said that the DIA experienced the biggest decrease in overall crime under chief detective Sylveran than at any other point in its recorded history.

“From February to March, there was a fourty-five percent decrease in crime which is something no other chief has accomplished” he said, “This is the biggest decrease in crime that you all are bearing witness to. A historic achievement!”

However, official numbers from the DIA show that a 94 percent decrease was reported between October and November of 2024— the biggest decrease in overall crime in recorded DIA history. Even so, former chief detective Tsukanai Daiki is not responsible for this, but rather the lockdowns imposed by Winter Storm Genesis that month that kept people indoors.

The decrease in crime between March and April is still hard to attribute to recent policy changes at the agency according to different analysts.

“It’s still early to figure out if Sylveran’s policies are truly reducing crime as it takes time for these effects to really be felt,” DPF analyst Charlotte Telara told me, “Historically, notable decreases in crime have been linked to certain events, not necessarily policies. Winter Storm Genesis contributed to the biggest decrease in crime. We also saw a big decrease in crime during the NEAP-1 outbreak in 2022.”

Charlotte says that she believes that the continuing decrease in crime is rather linked to Sylveran’s mere ascension to the office of chief detective.

“I believe that chief Sylveran’s rise to the office is linked to the decrease in crime and not really because of any policy enacted,” she explained, “Sylveran is famously known to be a remarkable bounty hunter and perhaps it’s that fear that’s keep people from committing crime knowing he’s the head of the DIA now.”

Charlotte explained that fear has historically been a factor that has been used— whether explicitly or not— to keep people in line.

“Interestingly, there's been a mix of explicit and inexplicit uses of fear from the DIA in recent weeks to prove this point. Sylveran himself has not really pronounced himself in recent weeks keeping a low profile, but his presence is definitely felt,” she said, “However, the DIA has made some peculiar statements and posts that are warnings to those on the run. Perhaps they’re trying to sound scary on purpose to keep these numbers low and use Sylveran’s history as a bounty hunter to prove such a point. It’s strange as we’ve never seen this tactic used before.”

A recent poll by the Academy of the dream world shows that chief Sylveran’s approval is slightly down from 56% in March to 54% in April. The numbers aren’t concerning for the DIA.

“We’re not worried about numbers, we’re worried about crime,” Levy said, “The chief detective still has a majority of the dream world on his side and once we get working harder than ever before, people will know that the DIA is definitely in good hands.”

Regardless, crime remains on the decrease across the dream world. For the latest news from the DIA, visit their webpage on the official DPF website for more, including other resources.

Q/A: Ask Cirrus

Dear Cirrus, how are special bulletins issued?

By: Stayt Ment

Hello Stayt! The DWPS typically issues bulletins routinely every day for their respective viewing areas and these “general” bulletins provide information about the forecast for the day and other essential information. When particular weather conditions are anticipated to change, either in a viewing area or across the dream world overall, a “special” bulletin is issued to address such changing weather conditions. 

These special bulletins contain information about what we’re monitoring and whether or not it is a cause for concern. These aren’t alerts, per se, but they sometimes act as precursors to actual alerts we may push out should weather conditions change dramatically!

Dear Cirrus, who is Neige?

By: Hugh Datt

Hello Hugh! You may have seen him issue weather bulletins or discuss ongoing events in this newspaper and wondered who he is. He’s a fellow meteorologist at the DWPS who joined upon its creation in 1958 (as did I). He’s a smart guy who may come off as a bit cold, but he means quite well! He loves his job as I do and wouldn’t trade it for anything else. If you ever see him, be sure to tell him I sent you!

Dear Cirrus, does the DWPS track other non-weather phenomenon?

By: Vul Kanos

Hello Vul! The DWPS also tracks some non-weather related phenomenon including tsunamis, volcanos, dreamquakes, etc. We also issue advisories for these types of events just like actual weather related events.

Dear Cirrus, what type of weather is your favorite?

By: Raini Daze

Hello Raini! My favorite type of weather has to be rainy weather! A lot of areas in the dream world are currently reporting rain, so you know this makes me very excited!

Dear Cirrus, what is hail?

By: Blokof Ayce

Hello Blokof! Hail is a form of precipitation defined as round pellets of ice that are produced in cumulonimbus clouds. They move up and down through the cloud by the updrafts and downdrafts, and as they do so, add layers of freezing rain to the pellet. When these pellets get too heavy, they fall to the ground from the cloud. They are typically 1 to 5 centimeters in diameter, but they can grow as big as tennis balls or even grapefruits!

 Hail can only be produced in cumulonimbus clouds, and these clouds are most common in the spring and summer times. If you find a hailstone, you can cut it in half and see rings in it. The number of rings in the hailstone indicate the number of times it circled up and down in the cloud before falling!

Dear Cirrus, how does the weather change while going around the dream world?

By: Gray D. Annt

Hello Gray! If you’ve been around the dream world, you’ll notice that the weather can vary depending on the location you’re in. Luckily, the weather doesn’t change dramatically in an instant, so you don’t have to worry about a sudden rainstorm. As you go around the dream world, you’ll begin to see and feel certain changes that’ll let you know what’s going on.

If it’s starting to get cooler, you’re likely heading into a wintry dimension. It’ll get colder the closer you get until the skies turn grey or dark and you see snow beginning to fall. The same can be said if you head into a non-wintry dimension; it’ll get warmer and you may see rain instead of snow. 

That being said, if you’re staying in an outdoor dimension for a while, any signs of upcoming changing weather will also be noticeable. Clouds may begin to form and the skies may darken, indicating an upcoming storm. It won’t be instant, but you’ll have time to seek shelter before it begins. It’s important to stay up to date on any changing weather conditions by listening to the DWPS and planning ahead. 

Don’t worry, most of the weather in the dream world is calm, but we’re still subjected to changing conditions. We don’t have control over it so just keep an eye to the sky and listen to our meteorologists for any updates on what’s to come!